Keeping the Right Friends to aid Your Life Journey – It’s no news that humans are interdependent. We were not designed to be lone rangers. We need friends. Even in a lone path, you’d still come across one or two persons. Nobody has a monopoly of the earth, we all own it, we live together, and there’s nothing we can do about that.
Knowing that we can’t avoid people, how do we, therefore, leverage this to our own advantage? As a scholar, you’re traveling abroad to study or in your home country. You’re leaving the walls of your family and friends. You’re about to start a new journey, you have to build new relationships. This relationship is pivotal to your life’s journey, it can either make or mar you.
Why Keeping The Right Friends?
You would have heard before that, show me your friend and I’ll tell you who you are. You’ve also probably heard the popular saying, you attract your kind. In the world we are in today, you will attract all manners of people, whether you’re a good person or otherwise. Your job is to know the kinds of relationship you want, or what you want in your relationship. If you don’t know what you want, you need to know what you don’t want. The last thing you want is a parasitic kind of relationship.
The relationship must be balanced on both sides, you must not be the only one benefiting, always look for ways to serve the other person too. The mutual value must be created.
Also, everybody can not be your friend. Some are better off as acquaintances, the goal is, we are talking about people you let into your space.
Let’s take a look at what you should look out for in friendship.
1. Friends that share your interest.
If you’re a lover of football, it’s only natural to love to have conversations with fellow football lovers. You might not have any other thing to discuss outside that. In fact, it could be that you only meet at the game house and you have their contact, in case you want them to keep space for you sometimes. However, you have to be mindful of such people. If you’re the kind that doesn’t like to associate yourself with smokers, because of your health. You are likely not going to develop any communication with this person. You can as well keep your chats at the minimum so that there won’t be expectations and you won’t look judgemental. Bottom line is, you need fun sometimes, keeping people of interest close can help you when you get bored.
2. Friends that have what you don’t.
Don’t get it twisted, it’s not about money or the parasitic kind of relationship. For instance, if you’re an athlete and you spot a very good athlete on the field. You feel he would be able to help you develop some skills, that’s you seeking for value. You can chat sometimes, if you’re comfortable around them, you can tell them your interest. Don’t forget relationship must be balanced on both sides, you must not be the only one benefiting, always look for ways to serve the other person too. The mutual value must be created.
3. Friends that challenge you
Friends that subject you to constant development must be held tight. This kind of friend, you respect them and you don’t want to fail them. They can be very rare to find. They may not challenge you in every area of life, but that particular part of your life that you seem to be displaying weakness on, they can help you. For instance, if you’re aiming towards First Class, perhaps you’ve not been a Straight-A student before. This new challenge of yours is possible, but much more possible if you keep a smart friend close. They help you with the difficult courses, ask you about your CGPAs, and scold you when you’re not performing well.
4. Friends that are loyal
This can never be overemphasized, the first thing is, are you a loyal person? If the answer is positive, you deserve someone like that in your life. Such a person that keeps your secret, gives you good advice, tells you to apologize to your boyfriend or girlfriend because you’re wrong. Such a person you can trust. Well, nobody can be trusted. But you know before you can finally come to a conclusion that a person can be trusted, you must have done your homework. Whether you like it or not, you need someone to trust in your life.